so many college aus

[ofbreath]

Being a double-major was hard. Especially when you were kind of an asshole student that waited until the last minute to do your bookwork, and nearly flunked out every grade but somehow managed to bat your precious baby blues at your professors to get extra time to hand in your shit.

Life had pretty much always been easy for John Egbert. He had an adoring (over-loving, suffocating, completely nerdy) father that provided him with everything he needed and thensome, he had a pretty cool half-sister that he hung out with in the summers, he'd pretty much always been liked. He was a mean (totally amateur) prankster, and had a decent amount of friends he'd made throughout the years. He drove a cerulean blue Toyota Prius (his father wanted to reduce their carbon footprint to the best of his ability-- both of their cars were Hybrids) with the license plate PCHOOOO on it, and today was the first day of his first sophomore semester. He was twenty-one, slowly growing out of his baby fat into a budding career in the music industry (really the business degree was just a backup and to please daddy), and was about to meet his roommate for the semester. A one "Dave Strider", according to the paperwork he'd been given.

So with a bright-ass green backpack with a nerdy slime ghost logo on the back of it over his shoulder and a black rollerboard in his other hand, he reached out and knocked on the door to apartment B413.

Comments

[ofbreath]

He would appreciate seeing Dave use his expensive as fuck equipment even more, let's be real. Possibly in as little clothing as possible-- I mean wait. John choked and laughed for a minute at Dave's hitched comment, shaking his head and hefting his backpack again.

"I will make you dinners beyond your wildest dreams, Dave," he joked, waggling his eyebrows. "Though peanuts shall never again grace this apartment, I hope you aren't attached to PB&J." He dangled his keys from a finger idly, peering into his given space. "Dad insisted on getting me a car before I left for school last year," he thought aloud. "So lemme know if you ever need a lift." He glanced at the bike and promptly burst into ugly laughter, bringing his hands to his mouth to cover it almost immediately. That had been rude, maybe Dave actually liked Barbie pink and streamers.

He grinned crookedly all up until Dave went into his schpiel about socks on doors and heads ups, at which point he came to the startling realization that he was still a nerdy virgin sophomore and his roommate was probably some kind of walking sex God. He blanched a little, laughing and nodding his head.

"I do have a lot of socks," he said dumbly. Wow, that was a stupid thing to say, why did he say that?

[knightime]

"Holy shit. Let me just worship you forever. I will kiss your dick and everything. I will worship it like it were my own. My life as a stereotypical college kid is over." He pretends to fake swoon a bit. "Naw. I don't eat it too often. I'm more of a grilled cheese guy. Takes longer to make, but payout is better."

He starts heading towards his room. John should probably follow. "Hey, you laugh now, but no one is willing to steal the bright ass pink bike. First of all, everyone at this point knows that's mine since I bike everywhere and anywhere, and no one is man enough to actually ride it regularly. I just hate getting my shit stolen." He also feels pretty riding it. Or something. Irony. God, he doesn't even know the definition of that word anymore with it being abused in his household.

"Does that mean you have a lot of sex?" That only makes sense, right? Lots of socks. Lots of sex.

[ofbreath]

John turned a comical shade of salmon over his pasty skin, the color flooding inward from his ears and down his neck, disappearing under the collar of his t-shirt. And then he laughed gently, because grilled cheese was something he could handle.

"If you put bacon in waffles have you ever tried putting it in grilled cheese," he asked, quirking an eyebrow above his glasses. "Bacon makes everything better, bro." He delicately sidestepped the comment about Dave kissing his dick, because that was a horrifyingly appealing concept. Holy shit Dave you've made him gay within five minutes.

"I'm laughing with you, I promise," he said. "You just can't hear yourself." Another grin. "But I guess that's a decent tactic-- I mean, I don't think I'm secure enough in my masculinity to ride a Barbie bike either. Does it have a bell?"

He paused in the hallway, the color returning to his face.

"Erm... nnno," he offered honestly, fidgeting. "Just a lot of socks. Unused socks, I guess you could say. Socks that don't see many doorknobs." John stop talking.

[knightime]

"Hell yes, I have. Bacon taste delicious in anything. I haven't found a food that doesn't taste good with bacon. Let's be real. It probably doesn't actually exist." Dave doesn't mean to. He's just naturally attractive and makes all guys question their sexualities.

"Naw, I got a horn on it. It's a little louder than a bike bell, and I rather be able to be noticed so a car doesn't try to nick me, you know? Gotta play safe since you don't wanna bike on the sidewalks." Even if cars aren't exactly fond of bikers in the streets. Whatever, he needs to get to places too.

Dave chuckles a bit. "Got it. Don't worry, man. Probably better if you didn't become a nympho anyways, you know? More to life than getting some. Even if getting some is nice." Dave waves his hand dismissively. "Come on. Let me get you those papers to sign and I'll give you a key."

[ofbreath]

"Yes, good," John agreed, grinning to show off his ridiculous beaver teeth. He rolled his shoulders a little and titled his head in thought. "You know, you're probably right. And if it does, it should be exterminated immediately for being a sin against mankind."

"Aw, no fun." He sulked just slightly. "But I suppose an alive-roommate is much cooler than a not-alive-roommate. So that's fair." He slipped his hands into his pockets. "Why not on the sidewalks, though?"

"Rad, I like keys," he offered dumbly, watching Dave's hand instead of his face. It was safer.

[knightime]

"I'm sure it wouldn't have survived as a food at this point. Bacon is basically the best gift bestowed to us." He thinks John will be a pretty good roommate. He likes bacon.

"Eh, I'm technically a vehicle on a bike. It's kind of like a less scary version of a car driving on the sidewalk. The person getting hit by the bike is probably gonna hurt a hell of a lot more and probably live to bitch you out for running them over."

Dave just saunters to his room. His room is in a state of organized mess. It's obvious that Dave knows how to get around his room, but holy shit it's a surprise he hasn't burned this building down with all the electricals plugged in. But there's some printed forms in the printer and he's grabbing keys for John from a metal tin on top of his (makeshift) table.