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[shitknickers]

This is a generic Jakepost to reply to. Because the meme post was all Jake and has some inconceivable amount of comments now so it doesn't like to load. Have at, my lovelies.

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[shitknickers]

The brown-haired Australian chuckled a bit and held out a hand, asking the last question Dirk wanted to answer.

"Mmmn, what's with the spooky ventriloquist puppet in your bag, anyway? I got your clothes out earlier and it was just kind of sitting in there. Do you use that for some kind of kink stunt at work or something...?" Truth be told, the thing had looked well-loved, in the way that a child's toy looks. He had a feeling it wasn't a kinky stripper toy.

[shitknickers]

Strip ventriloquist rapping sounds like a terrible idea. Jake does not condone nor approve of this idea. And actually Cal being under his bed sort of unnerved him. He reached out blindly regardless, until he found Dirk's arms and rubbed at them gently.

"You were extremely out of it," he conceded. "He's sort of an alarming little thing. But I assume he means a lot to you if you brought him along in a fever-addled haze."

[shitknickers]

"I had you meet my grandmother after we'd been in an extremely casual relationship for a week, Dirk," Jake intoned with a smile, forehead against Dirk's and his eyes closed. "And then I was nervous-sick for half the night. I have absolutely no room to judge you for anything you do or any spooky ventriloquy puppets you care tenderly for."

[shitknickers]

"I've never really been a fan of pupp--oh." Well, that sure was a puppet in his lap. He glanced downward. "I think it's the soulless blue eyes staring at me from whatever angle I look at it," he offered, his voice hushed as though Cal might hear him.

[shitknickers]

"I--. Dirk." Don't leave him here with this puppet, did you not just hear the soulless blue eyes comment he made? SOULLESS, DIRK. He sat very still with Cal in his lap, pointedly looking anywhere but him. He was going to murder you, Dirk Strider.

[shitknickers]

Jake... hadn't really moved in the time Dirk was gone. If anything he'd just stared at his walls or anything that wasn't Cal.

"Can you please remove this from my person," he requested when Dirk made his way back to the bedroom.

[shitknickers]

He shuddered a bit, shaking out his arms.

"I make an honest effort to be a part of your life," Jake corrected, but scrunched his face up nontheless. "I just don't like puppets. Your little friend there reminds me far too much of the ventriloquy dummy featured in the Saw films."

[shitknickers]

Okay, this was tolerable. As long as Dirk wasn't going to expect him to love and embrace the puppet. Because he was not going to love nor was he going to embrace the puppet. Just no. He slid his arm carefully around Dirk's shoulders.

"...feeling any better?"

[shitknickers]

Jake brought his hand up to gauge his forehead to Dirk's, thinking for a moment.

"You've cooled down a little, but not enough for me to think you're okay yet." He bumped his head sideways into DIrk's, gently. "Just take it easy. There's more soup, I think as long as we keep your fluids up and you don't try to run off gallivanting into the night you should be okay."

[shitknickers]

"Let's get some soup in you, and then we can see about a shower." He didn't move immediately. "Stay here, I'll bring some back for you." He wasn't sure he wanted Dirk trying the stairs yet.

[shitknickers]

Jake's eyebrows climbed north for the winter.

"Is that a challenge?" he asked, smirking.

[shitknickers]

"I thought as much." He bumped his head back against Dirk's and slid away, standing. "You can come along if it bothers you that much."

[shitknickers]

A snort, at that, and Jake shook his head, moving for the door.

"To soup, then."