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[shitknickers]

THE RANDOM SCENARIO MEME 3.0



→ I've made separate threads for my characters who are available. If you want to thread with one of them...
→ Go to RNG and enter 1-7 for a scene type, and 1-20 for a scene to play out, or just pick something seriously lbr you're probably going to do that anyway.
→ Comment to the character you want to thread with and set up the scene.
→ Note that I am absolutely shit at RPing fights and sex, but more power to you if you're willing to put up with my pathetic attempts.
→ Have fun!

TYPE OF SCENE.

① Action → Gun fights, bar brawls, fights to the death are all possible scenarios.
② Angst → Characters suffer emotionally or physically from relationships breaking up, death, injury, etc. Hurt and comfort themes are included.
③ Crack → Genderswaps, super powers, sudden compulsions are all possible outcomes.
④ Fluff → Something that is devoid of angst. It's light-hearted and might have the overtone of romance.
⑤ Gen → General fun, things that didn't fit in the other categories.
⑥ Sex → First times, kinks, even dubcon are all possible themes of sex related scenarios.
⑦ Your choice → Think of your own scenario, choose one of the above or make a combo even!

ACTION.

① Zombies → It's the zombie apocalypse, lock and load!
② Bar brawl → You had one too many drinks, said something wrong, and now you're being asked to take it outside.
③ Chase → You're caught in a high speed chase.
④ Gun fight → You're caught in a big shoot-out.
⑤ Fight with a friend → You're fighting with a friend, all out.
⑥ Interrogation → You're being interrogated for some offense you've done.
⑦ Aliens → Aliens are attacking and you're not going to take your probe laying down!
⑧ Final battle → This is it. The battle that will end all the fighting for you. Will you win? Will you get that peace you want?
⑨ Training → You're not actually fighting, just training for the inevitable.
⑩ No hope → You know this fight has no hope. It's not going to end well for anyone involved, but you can't turn away.
⑪ Sneaking in → You're stealing a diamond or sneaking in to kick some bad guy butt, but whatever it is, you have to practice stealth.
⑫ Blue wire → You're faced with a bomb that needs to be disarmed.
⑬ Fight for honour → You've been disgraced or someone you care about has, so it's time to fight for honour.
⑭ Showdown → Time for a cowboy-style showdown. Whoever draws the fastest wins.
⑮ War → You're caught in the middle of a war here. Remember to keep your chin up and keeping fighting.
⑯ Apocalypse → The apocalypse finally happened and now you're left to scavenge and fight for whatever is left.
⑰ Sabotage → It's time to sabotage someone's plan! How is entirely up to you. Do you set up a bomb in their toilet? Do you double cross them at the last minute?
⑱ Big damn hero → You know you have to handle this one alone, so that means disarming or knocking unconscious the person who wants to join you.
⑲ Fight club → You know the rules... you're in an underground fighting ring and you're fighting with all you've got.
⑳ Threaten → You've just been sent here to rough them up a little, threaten them into behaving.

ANGST.

① Injury / illness → Your character has become injured or ill! To what extent is the mun's choice.
② Last moments → You character has been gravely injured and this is their last chance to say their last words.
③ Depression → Your character is depressed, what actions they take is up to the mun.
④ Betrayed → You character has been betrayed by the other. How do they react?
⑤ Tortured → Your character is being tortured and needs rescuing or at least a sympathetic ear to help him through it.
⑥ Jealousy → Your character is feeling jealous and must deal with it, how will they do it?
⑦ Breakup! → This relationship has gone as far as it can, it's time to breakup.
⑧ Broken → For whatever reason, the character is broken, mentally or or physically.
⑨ Fight → You can't even be in the same room as your friend or lover without arguing anymore.
⑩ Lost → You lost the biggest fight of your life and now all you can do is try to pick up the pieces.
⑪ Worst nightmare → Whatever you fear the most is now real or maybe you're just trapped in a dream together, but whatever it is, it feels too real.
⑫ Addicted → You're addicted to something, alcohol, drugs, sex, whatever. It's destroying your life and you can't do anything to stop it.
⑬ Hurt you → You're being forced to hurt someone you love either by betraying them or even being forced to shout things you don't mean. It's for their own good in the end though.
⑭ Separation → You were forced to leave this person for their own safety and while you've been miserable without them, you really didn't mean to run into them again... maybe it was by accident or you were watching them from afar this whole time.
⑮ Becoming a monster → You are slowly changing, becoming a monster: vampire, zombie, demon, something you can't recover from and no-one can help you.
⑯ Frozen → You are entirely helpless, frozen, to stop some kind of disaster.
⑰ Prison → You were very bad and now it's time to pay the price by turning yourself in or maybe the law just finally caught up to you.
⑱ Fear → You're not sure why, but you are suddenly terrified and you can't deal with it. You need help.
⑲ Hated → You are now hated by the person you loved the most.
⑳ Down and out → You're living on the streets, you've hit rock bottom, and you don't know what to do.

CRACK.

① Sexswap → Uh-oh, you're suddenly the opposite sex!
② Forced confessions → No matter what it is and no matter how hard you resist, you're going to be compelled to spill some deep dark secret!
③ Mind-reading → You've suddenly got the ability to read minds!
④ Animal → You're suddenly part animal or transformed into an animal!
⑤ Awkward pick-up lines → You're compelled to use bad pickup lines on whoever is closest!
⑥ Back in School / Graduated → You're suddenly back in school! Or if you were already in it, you've aged and long since graduated!
⑦ Vampires, werewolves, and zombies, oh my! → You're suddenly a vampire, werewolf, or zombie! Maybe even a demon or a devil, whatever creepy crawly you can think of. What do you do now?
⑧ Ghost → You're suddenly a ghost or at least invisible. What are you going to do with this new ability?
⑨ Awkward conversations → So did you just fart or what? Any conversation goes, as long as it's embarrassing and awkward.
⑩ Crossdressing → For whatever reason, you're suddenly dressed in clothes of the opposite sex.
⑪ Suddenly naked → Oops! Your clothes are suddenly gone.
⑫ Suddenly a kid → You're a kid again! Have fun with that second childhood.
⑬ Fortune cookie → You've suddenly received a note with something that will happen in the future, either precise or vague.
⑭ Super power → And suddenly you're like Superman! Any power goes.
⑮ Bodyswap → Somehow you've changed bodies with the other person.
⑯ Back in time → Somehow, you wound up in the past again. Do you try to correct something or just sit and wait for time to jump? Maybe it jumps to various points in your life or maybe you actually think you're back in the day. Have fun, run wild with the idea!
⑰ To the future → Is it everything you've dreamed? Is it horrible? Whatever happens, you're here to witness what happens to you in the future. Either you take the place of your future self or you're just there to watch. Might cause some confusion if people start seeing double though...
⑱ Angels, mermaids, and fairies! → You're not necessary something dark or evil. You're just something different. How do you deal?
⑲ Locked in a closet → For some reason, you're locked up in a closet with someone else. Do you make nice and try to figure your way out or what?
⑳ Finger trap → You're caught in a Chinese finger trap... with somebody else! You can't figure out how to get loose either... have fun with that.

FLUFF.

① Cuddling → For whatever reason, characters feel like being close and cuddling.
② Pillow talk → After the main event, characters are up for some pillow talk.
③ Celebration → Anniversary or some other big event is taking place and characters want to celebrate!
④ Love confession → Someone has finally decided to confess their love and today is the day!
⑤ Appreciation → You feel the need to show appreciation for that person closest to you, even if it's just a pat on the back.
⑥ Apologies → You made a mistake and now it's time to make it up in some way you know the other can't refuse!
⑦ Get back together → Why did you break up again exactly? Whatever the reason, it was a huge mistake and you both know you can work through it.
⑧ Date night → You've planned for a wonderful night together and you can't wait to get it started.
⑨ Family → You've either found out you're pregnant or you've already got that addition to your family.
⑩ Marriage → You're just about to get hitched or maybe you're enjoying your honeymoon. Maybe you've been together for years now! Whatever the case, it's time for that next big step.
⑪ Meeting again → It's time for that happy reunion finally!
⑫ Love at first sight → For whatever reason, you are now insanely in love with the first person you set eyes on.
⑬ Flirtation → You can't resist to do a little bit of harmless flirtation all of a sudden.
⑭ In the snow → Look outside! It's a winter wonderland, so why not go out and play in it?
⑮ Engagement → You've planned it all out and now it's time to finally pop the question.
⑯ Friendly games → You've set up the game station or board games for a friendly competition!
⑰ Gift → Time to give that special someone a gift just because.
⑱ Recovery → You're taking care of someone who's just recovered from some illness or injury.
⑲ Healing → Time to help mend that someone who's been through hell and back.
⑳ Better than ever → You've finally got everything you've ever wanted here. What is your ideal life and who does it include?

GEN.

① Nice meeting you → It's your first time meeting this person! You bumped into each other on the street, in a bar, at work... whatever!
② Drinks → You're out for drinks! Or just chilling at home with some beers. Wherever!
③ Lost → You're lost and you kind of need help finding your way to where you're going. A little help with directions?
④ Costume party → You're at a costume party, both of you are wearing masks. Do you keep the anonymity or take it off and see whose company you've been enjoying?
⑤ Wrong number → Oops, actually you didn't mean to call that person...
⑥ Drunk → You're already drunk! Drunk dialing, stumbling into someone, showing up unexpected... what type of drunk are you anyway? Aggressive, loving, happy? How does the other react?
⑦ Old friends → you haven't seen this person in a long time!
⑧ Rivals → you're suddenly rivals! Or maybe you have been all along...
⑨ Problems → you've got a problem with each other, just got in a huge fight, whatever. Try to work it out!
⑩ What are your intentions... → This person? They're dating a close friend, family member, etc. You need to find out if they're going to hurt them! Or you need to discuss your friend/family's dating choice.
⑪ I saw you → you saw the other person doing something bad and you need to confront them about it.
⑫ Sorry but no → the other person has feelings that you just don't share. They don't necessarily have to be romantic... maybe you just don't agree with their sudden desire to quit their job and start a business making tiny, fuzzy teddy bears.
⑬ My hero → you need to tell this person how much they mean to you. They've been your best friend or your role model your whole life and they need to know.
⑭ Enabler → you're enabling the other (or each other) to do something bad, really bad. Addiction, stealing, killing, or just any other self-destructive behavior.
⑮ Cooking → Time for an impromptu cooking lesson!
⑯ Oh, sure, I remember you... → It's that awkward moment when someone comes up and seems to know you, but you have no idea who they even are!
⑰ Rescue! → One of you was in trouble, but you came to the rescue!
⑱ Boss → One of you works under the other. Is your relationship good? Are you scheming things? Or do you hate each other?
⑲ Perfect crime → You and the other person have just pulled off the perfect crime... or you're planning to! What are you doing? The heist of the century, an assassination?
⑳ Movies → movie night! Maybe it's a sleepover. Whichever the case, it's time to eat a lot and have fun.

SEX.

① First time → it's your first time together or your first time ever! Enjoy the awkward times!
② Bondage → You and your partner decide to experiment a little with ropes or handcuffs or whatever you'd like to tie your partner up with.
③ Rough / Aggressive → Your characters want it rough.
④ Romantic → Slow and gentle, meaningful, that's how characters want it.
⑤ Dubcon → Character A wants Character B and it doesn't really matter if Character B wants it as bad or not.
⑥ In public → Characters feel like taking a risk and doing it in a public place.
⑦ Roleplay → Naughty nurse fetish? Pirate kink? You and your partner decide to try it out now!
⑧ Healing → You've both fought hard or gone through a rough time and it's time to get some R&R in.
⑨ Last time → This is the last time you're going to this because you're breaking up or maybe your lover is running off to sacrifice their lives in some heroic way. The possibilities are endless, but you better make this one count.
⑩ No strings attached → You're just friends with benefits. Nothing wrong with that, right?
⑪ Anonymous → You met in a restroom or bar, any location of your choosing, but you don't even know each other's names.
⑫ Toys → You're eager to try something new, so why not toys?
⑬ Aphrodisiacs → You've been slipped a strong aphrodisiac somehow and now you absolutely cannot control yourself.
⑭ Show → You're putting on a show by either doing it right in the club or filming it for a bunch of people.
⑮ Ménage à trois → It's time for that threesome you've always dreamed of.
⑯ Non-penetrative → Frottage, handjobs, whatever you want to try out.
⑰ Controlled → You are under mind control and must do whatever your lover asks of you.
⑱ Hatesex → It's not just rough or aggressive, you absolutely cannot stand each other.
⑲ Extreme → Fisting, knifeplay, whatever you can think of so long as it tests the boundaries.

Comments

[ofbreath]

[Oh he did not want to have this conversation right now.]

[He closed his eyes for a moment, glad they were stopped at a light.]

He worked for an intelligence firm. Lot of collared shirts and black ties and paperwork.

[goodboybestshot]

[Sorry John. You need to hear this while he's still lucid. He's going to spend the next week doped up on morphine.]

[He makes a small thoughtful noise at that.]

...I spoke with the head of the Felt about some dealings he may have had recently. Does Skaianet ring familiar with you?

[ofbreath]

[He pulls away from the stoplight when it turns green, glances sidelong at Jake with a frown.]

...yeah, that's the name of the firm he worked for. He was a... vice president of something or other, I think. He was pretty high in the rankings. [He's starting to feel a little bit nauseous at where this conversation is heading.]

[goodboybestshot]

[He nods to that.]

It shouldn't be all that hard to believe that large businesses like that have a bit of dirty dealing. This is all vague hearsay, but it seems to me that ...The kingpin of the Felt, Lord English, was aiming to sink his fingers into Skaianet.

It's my understanding they made an example of some poor soul who had the bollocks to stand up and say no.

[ofbreath]

[Nope.]

[Nope nope nope nopenopenopenope.]

[John Egbert is somehow a master of driving with blurry vision.] So you almost got yourself killed for the same reason? Just to tell me that Dad's stupid need to stop evildoers like he was some kind of comic book superhero got him killed? [He'd figured as much, really, but hearing it still hurts more than he could have imagined. It's like they're burning him on the funeral pyre all over again.]

[But apart from periodic hitches in his breath and the way his hands shake on the steering wheel, he's doing all right. He has to get Jake home. He doesn't have time for this.]

[goodboybestshot]

I told you that my state was not something I had anticipated on.

[He frowns.]

I suppose I should have. One does not walk out on the Felt without grand repercussions

[ofbreath]

Right, yeah, because you running away from daddy and becoming an assassin was going to work out perfectly. What were you expecting, him to come knocking on your door and say "son I'm so proud of you"?? Jesus Christ, Jake, you're an idiot but you're not stupid.

[Whoops.]

[goodboybestshot]

I was hoping for something more civil after the twenty years I put in as his blood hound.

[There was a bitterness there, but it wasn't directed at John.]

[ofbreath]

[He laughs-- a single, angry bark of a sound which devolves into about ten second's worth of sobbing before he scrubs at his eyes.]

And when were you planning on telling me that, anyway? Oh, I guess you weren't, because I had to find out when I came to extract you, missing an eye, from the bowels of your father's mansion. Just-- [He shakes his head.] Just shut up, I need to drive, and you need to stop talking before I finish what he started in a complete loss of what sanity I've actually retained.

[goodboybestshot]

Can you honestly say you wouldn't think differently of me if I told you my father was the single most feared individual in the entire city? That aside, I shouldn't have to explain my entire lineage when my blood is not what makes me who I am.

[Definitely some bitterness. He goes quiet after that, though. Opting to just let John drive.]

[ofbreath]

[He's damn-near completely silent for the rest of the drive, which thankfully isn't long, and sits in the driver's seat for a moment with the car still running but in park.]

[He's still not okay, and he's probably still snotty and teary, but he shuts the car off and gets out and circles around to Jake's side of the car to help him out.]

[He's really quiet when he actually speaks.]

I'm sorry, okay? I'm just a stupid selfish brat, and like it or not you're all I've got anymore. So I'm sorry if I'm not really all that great at handling almost losing the last thing I have-- again.

[goodboybestshot]

[Jake observes the silence. He stews a bit in his own irritation. He's not used to having to explain himself, and the notion that John was mad a him for not telling him about his connection to Lord English bothered him.]

[Maybe he just wasn't that used to people worrying about him like that. He lost his grandmother some ten years ago.]

[When John apologizes most all of that irritation dissipates.]

...I'm sorry as well. Being a loner is a difficult habit to break.

[ofbreath]

[He feels like such a child around Jake sometimes. He's never seen the guy upset, not really. And here he is, for the umpteenth time, crying over his father. And Jake himself, really.]

[He stoops, draping Jake's arm back around his shoulders to help him out of the car.]

Come on.

[goodboybestshot]

[He hmphs as John helps him out of the car. He does everything in his power to bite down the hiss of pain that his body wants him to make.]

[Be glad you haven't seen Jake upset. Its usually a disaster with a body count.]

By your leave.

[That's a bad joke, considering he's almost entirely immobile.]

[ofbreath]

[John's not even gonna try to hide the fact that once Jake is standing he's kind of hugging onto him for a minute before he moves them toward the house.]

[He does manage a slight chuckle at the by your leave, though. He shakes his head.]

More like by my drag, I think.

[goodboybestshot]

[He makes a noise of affirmation and let's John drag him into the house. The great thing about all this is that John should be well versed in where the medical supplies are by now. In the morning Jake would consider going to the doctor. He has one for more serious issues that he really generally doesn't have to explain anything to.]

[Mob connections were great sometimes.]

[ofbreath]

[John didn't fuck around when it came to medical attention. He had only ever learned basic first aid in school, but with his recent career change he'd seen fit to do a bit of research (mostly by way of YouTube). So he pulled Jake carefully through the house and to the bathroom in his room, setting him on the closed toilet lid. He grabbed a throw pillow, as an afterthought, one of those decorative ones that is too hard to actually be comfortable to sleep on, and set it behind his lower back so he could recline.]

[In the artificial lighting, he finally had a chance to really look at the damage, and he bit his lip.]

...Jesus, Jake. [He got a dark cloth and wet it with lukewarm water, cleaning him up gingerly first.]

[goodboybestshot]

[Jake chuckled quietly to his reaction. He winced here and there while John cleaned him up. ]

Not a good look? I thought perhaps I could pull off the eyepatch look what do you think?

[ofbreath]

[Oh my God, Jake. He snorts, softly, shaking his head and setting the cloth over his ruined eye, smiling in a way that may look just a hair too fond. Or maybe it's your poor depth perception.]

Do what you want 'cause a pirate is free, Jake.

[goodboybestshot]

I did make our aquaintance with a well placed pirate quote. I think I should look into a career change after all.

[He cringed feeling the cloth over where his eye once was. Boy he had some adjustments to make. ]

[ofbreath]

...You're gonna need to see an actual doctor as soon as possible for this. I don't think I'm gonna find a How-to on Youtube for missing eyes. Shit.

[He wouldn't lie, the missing eye thing was going to freak him out for a while. Especially since he currently had his hand over what was now a slowly-clotting, but otherwise merrily bleeding gaping hole in Jake's face.]

[He liked his eyes, too.]

[...Eye.]

[He swallowed, carefully lifting and then replacing the cloth. He was going to need to staunch the blood with something more permanently, or the cleaning he'd done on Jake's face wasn't going to mean a damn thing.]

...hold this for me.

[And he frowned at the first aid kit for a while, stuffing a few things into his vest so they're pinned between it and his shirt. He came back over with a cotton ball, which he pulled apart a bit to make it fluffier. He wound up spreading it over the socket of Jake's ruined eye and then covering it with a gauze pad, then loosely wrapping a generous amount of bandages around his head.]

...What else did they do to you?

[goodboybestshot]

[You're telling him. He was the one who needed to get used to aiming with one eye. He was going to be confined to the shooting range for weeks. ]

I have a doctor on call. He doesn't ask questions. If you'll be so kind I may have to have you ring him for me.

[He takes a breath, slow and shuddering.]

I think I may have a few busted ribs. Most everything else is skin deep. Cuts, bruises, and the like.

[ofbreath]

Can he come out here? If you've got broken ribs, with the way you're already merrily bleeding out from a hole in your head that shouldn't be there, you really shouldn't move much...

[He crouches down and doesn't hesitate when he reaches out and sets his hands on either side of Jake's ribcage, gently. He puts the slightest amount of pressure, methodically, down each individual rib to figure out which ones are worse off.] I'm probably gonna need you to take off your shirt to get you braced and bandaged.

[goodboybestshot]

I'd prefer not. What's kept my alive this long is the anonymity of my home. I can make the trip to the car, don't wo--[He hisses a john hits a busted rib.]

You'll have to cut the shirt loose.

[ofbreath]

[John tsks lightly, shaking his head and moving to undo the buttons of Jake's tailcoat-vest without even bothering to ask him permission.]

I'm so convinced. But if I don't take you you won't call the guy at all because you're a stubborn asshole, so let me at least get you bandaged and then I'll call the guy. You're lucky I dropped out of school for this assassin crap.